Tuesday, 30 April 2013

Help! Advice please!

SirDD and I have now been together a year yesterday and everything is great except.......I found out he lied about something. I won't go into it, it was a small thing but he knows that the one thing that I cannot stand is anyone who lies, it really is my pet hate.

So, I etxt him and told him that I found out he had lied and expected his response to be, 'i'm sorry, I know you hate liars, I love you and know this kind of thing hurts you and I will not do it again'. Alas, no, I got a load of txts saying he had not done anything wrong and what a bad nasty person I thought he was'.

What the hell..........I know from speaking to people that he hates being caught out. The lie itself isn't as important as the fact that he did it! And not admitting it even when caught out! I have no idea how to handle it, and clearly he cannot admit when he is wrong and apologise for it!

Also he tried the stop it or I will spank you remark.....so I can't voice an opinion without fear of getting spanked? How wrong is that. I find out he has lied and threatens to spank me.....using DD to his own advantage I think.

I know he cheated several times in his last marriage and even when caught out blamed it on something else, should this small lie be a warning sign to me? We are getting married next year and it would break my heart if he lied to me in the future.

Any advice would be much appreciated,

Princess x


  1. Wow, sorry to read about this problem that the two of you are having.
    You absolutely have to clear the air on this issue. You are always going to have doubts if you don't.
    There should be no spankings over this issue, how else are you going to speak what is truly on your mind.
    Stand firm until you are satisfied with his answers.
    Best of luck to you.


  2. Problem is, he always ends up making me feel like i am the one who has done wrong and not him.

    Princess x

    1. If it bothering you as much as you say, don't cave in keep pressing the issue it is better to find out what is going on now than later.


  3. Best thing to do is to follow your gut. I totally agree with Bob.

  4. How can you trust him?? If he lies to you this time, doesn't acknowledge it or ask for forgiveness, how can you ever trust him again??

    You NEED to re-evaluate your relationship with him--maybe find someone who will consisitently be HONEST with you!

    Just sayin'!

  5. It definitely IS a warning sign. Do not marry if you have doubts.

    Lying may be unavoidable, for him, if that has been his lifelong habit. However not admitting it is the more serious part. It means there cannot be an intimate relationship between you both.

    Hang on to your own convictions and don't cave.

  6. Oh goodness..... This is a bad bad sign. Blaming his own misgivings on others is not ok. Leopards don't change their spots, sorry.


  7. i'm sorry about this princess. :( i hope things are better soon and you're back to blogging again.


  8. Dump him. He shouldn't be threatening you for this. It shows bad form and that he is an irresponsible HoH.